Tuesday, April 4, 2017

Considering my situation as a person with schizophrenia

In a recent meditation I came to know my purpose to "help future generations understand people with schizophrenia". I complete my purpose by blogging. Blogging is my religion. My life goal is to live with dignity and be a friend to those I've met through the years.

As a person with schizophrenia I hear voices. I also hear the voice of God. God in my paradigm is that little voice inside your head that whispers yes or no. I don't think of God as an anthropomorphic being. I view God as an extension of the consciousness granted unto me as an advanced human being. All I have is the now. As far as I see there is no past. There is no future. There is only now. The real truth might be different as far as past, presents, and futures go however I know this moment exists and that is all I'm working with.

InI am a pronoun. InI not a he. InI not a she. InI be InI. Hard for some to understand. The closest translation would be He'n'She cept it's InI. Bob Marley said he's woman in the morning time. That mean he have a soul of a woman alongside the soul of man. The most sublime truth for any individual is InI. I-man soul and i-woman soul. There is a lot of gender confusion in the world in 2017. Well I perceive there to be much confusion. I might be mistaken. If we had these truths go out that each person has two souls for every one heart we'd see greater happiness Each has an emperor and empress inside InI. See the pronouns himself and herself are outdated. InI is simpler and it conveys much greater truth. The only time InI use the pronoun HIM is when I refer to divinity. H.I.M. which stands for His Imperial Majesty.

I haven't read the Urantia Book in full. I'm working on it. However someone said in a forum to believe that Haile Sellasie is Jesus Reincarnated is wishful thinking. I'm guilty of this crime. To me the time frame is this. I know not when Jesus will return and set up a righteous government. In fact my conscience tells me that will not happen. My conscience tells me that Jesus came back to earth as HIM he came black. through the line of king Solomon and king David. Africa has yet to rise. I hope and pray for a united africa. How much longer Jah shall we suffer a sickly body? When shall be the day of African repatriation?

So again I contemplate how I'm a person with schizophrenia. Does schizophrenia have me because I believe man is god? Or does schizophrenia have me because I hear voices?

The closer I am to God (InI) the closer I am to the veil of forgetfulness. The closer I am to the veil the closer I am to the voices that are jealous that say "Stupid!" "Worthless" "Slut!" "Kill Yourself". I'm close to these spirits. I pray for their eternal behalf. They are a fallen lot. I never met a baddy that couldn't become good. So even when I'm tempted to scream "Fuck off!" I don't I take my time and get closer to my creator Jah Rastafari. En el nombre del mas alto Dios. Amen.

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